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In the aftermath of murder, a mother’s grief never ends

What happens in the aftermath of a killing — not the funeral, not the media sensation (if there is any) — but what happens to the victim’s loved ones? Today would be my son Jeaco’s 41st birthday if he was not murdered nine years ago. Jeaco was the “go to” person in my immediate family and in his circle of friends. Jeaco was a very wise and respected young man. Since he left, my daughters and grandson, young Jeaco, have suffered severe trauma. I saw my son buried and with him a part of me that will never return — as he will not on this earth. Jeaco’s son, a little clone of Jeaco, is confused and fatherless. I love all of my grandsons, but speaking from an honest place, they are not my son. You don’t replace one child with another or one life with another. I am more fortunate than a lot of mothers who have lost their only child or more children, but I did lose my oldest child and only son and it hurts tremendously. It hurts more than severe labor pains and a relentless toothache. You can apply some type of treatment or medicine to decrease most physical pain, but the pain a mother suffers from the loss of a child — there is no medicine in this world to control it or decrease it. Only our heavenly father can help alleviate it. When my son died I threw myself more deeply into my job as a teacher, which seemed to be helping until my body started falling apart and I begun to experience more down days — and those days left me with my thoughts and pain!

My point is simply this­; when a precious life is taken from a family by a vicious act, it does not just impact one life but many lives. We hurt over the loss of our loved ones, but there is a critical difference when your loved one was murdered. I still have a vivid image of my son’s cold body being carted away off the streets of Detroit by the medical examiner’s van.

Another mother I know is grieving now over the image of seeing her son brutally killed with the gunmen reaching over her while she was covering her wounded son’s body begging “Do not kill my son,” but the killer didn’t listen. He shot her son a few more times. God please watch over her and her family. I can’t conceive what this mother is feeling — only that we both have lost our sons to senseless murders for no good reason and they are no longer in our lives.

Please pray for this mom because prayers will help. For those who may wonder what happens in the aftermath of a killing, here I sit on my son’s 41st birthday without my son. Please people help stop the violence, killing, pain!

Shushanna Shakur

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